first chap priv

[Pandora]

Ok I'm posting this first chapter because it's more of a prologe and had very little connection to the actual story line. Hope you like it anyways.


Falishea Made her way down the main highway in Fort City after a routine patrol down it’s long winding streets. It wasn’t something she did often, but she felt she needed to every once in a while. As a way to prove she wasn’t to good to work among the lower ranks.

She strode proudly at the head of her squad, following behind a pair of Crimson clad soldiers. Although, she much rather be at the very front of the group. He father gave strict orders for her to be protected in this manner at all times. “One can’t be too careful with all the rebels mucking about.” to quote him exactly.

The rebels had been rather upset when ever her father overthrew their king . She couldn’t say she could blame them, but she still saw no reason for them to go after her. After all she was only being a loyal child by following him. She had no real bouts with the rebels besides that, and in her own personal opinion it was their own fault for not supporting the former king better.
Suddenly, her guardsmen came to a halt in the road in front of her. An old beggar woman had scampered into the street ahead of them. The tiny wrinkled thing stood as firm in her place as a tree. Cautiously she pulled her tattered garments closer around her boney figure, and squinted up at Falishea. With small glassy, blackened eyes.

“What’s the hold up?” Falishea questioned the guard to the left of her. The guard sighed and shook his head sorrowfully.

“This old lady right here. She refuses to move so that we can pass. She keeps calling us traitors. That and you know, the usual rebel rants.” He spoke in an annoyed tone.
Instead of sharing his aggravation. Falishea pranced up to the woman gleefully.

“Move it old hag!” she bellowed , and trusted her index finger in the direction she wanted the old woman to travel. The beggar stood unmoving and unimpressed. She wasn’t going to just up and move that easily.

“May the Demis strike me down before I move and inch in your accord. “ The old woman hissed angrily. Falishea ignored the threat and laughed at the old woman. Surely she didn’t think she could stand against a troop of Crimson Soldiers.

“you are one brave little hag. I must give you that, but if you continue to refuse to move out of our way. I will have my men here toss you old crippled bone of a body into a jail cell. For disturbance of the peace.” Falishea chirped with a sickening happiness ringing though her voice as she spoke.

“I follow only the laws of our guardian who serves the grand God of all. She will soon return from his kingdom, and reap the revenge of Admide’car. You and your kind will be the first who suffer her wrath.” The beggar lashed out with a sharp tongue .
“Ah, so I’ve been told countless times before now, and yet I have yet to see this great and mighty guardian you rebels always go on about. I really don’t have time to stand around and chat all day so you’ll be going to that dungeon cell after all.

Besides, I think you’ll like your cell better than the street allies you’re used to scurrying around. It’s cleaner, and the daily meals and straw bed is more than likely a big step up from the life you lead now. So, If you really think about it I rewarding you for an act of treason. Would your precious guardian really punish me for that?

Now my soldiers will see you to your new home. I’m now done with this conversation, and the sight of you is making me feel a bit sick.” She growled and made a motion toward the woman to her men.

With that half of the armor clad bodies behind her marched over to the woman, and dragged the frail bodied woman off in the opposite direction. Falishea shook her head at them as they went. Causing her long golden locks to lash back and forth around her head. It was as if she were trying to shake off the small amount of guilt she felt.

“We have done so much for this country yet the people still seem to rebel against us one by one. I guess at the very lest we should be grateful. They haven’t got the brains to organize enough people for a full scale rebellion. Plus that stupid guardian they keep ranting on about. I hear we should be thanking our lucky stars she hasn’t shown up yet.” She rambled on to the Guard she’d spoken to before. Then he slowed his pace to match Falishea’s perfectly.

“You really shouldn’t worry so much about it your highness. It’s just a local fairy tale. I’m sure you’ve herd it quite a few times. I think it goes like this. The guardian of the realms. A beautiful pale skinned angel with sparkling blue eyes. Who’s hair flows long and silver, and two stray locks of red curl under her chin. With wings and tail of silver fox fluff. With ears of the same, but not from fluff. Her childish innocents charms the world, while her stern scorn will smite all that is wrong in the world.

She doesn’t sound like the type that goes around avenging crabby old ladies. Even if she did exist. Sounds more like she’d be frolicking around fields saving animals from poachers.” The guard joked playfully.

“No seriously, what’s the real story behind this Guardian figure.” she asked now twirling a small piece of her hair between her porcelain fingers in an almost flirtatious manner.

“Well, as far as the story goes the grand God of all sent her to this realm to protect this wee little planet smack dab in the middle of it all. She supposedly Stood by generations of rulers in the earlier years of our nation. She helped in wars and had a hand in molding Admide’car into what it is today.

Our former king. King Zara, noticed that that as time passed She started to loose the glimmer and the liveliness she once had. Seeing this ,he had it ordered as one last service to him as king. She was told to go back to the heavens and to be with her own kind. In the end she did agree to leave and swore that if the people of Admide’car ever were in direr need of her help. She’d once again descend from the heavens and bring peace, and justice.

Needless to say the fall of the former king has caused quite a bit of problems which has a lot of people upset. You can’t blame them for grasping onto such a fairy tale. So that’s the whole story behind all these crazies coming out of the wood works.” He explained.

“Hmp, well, that’s all interesting enough. The big question now is how we plan on killing this hope among the people before it gets out of hand. I can’t have any more people use this as an excuse to go against my father.” She told the guard while pressing though her own thoughts on finding a solution to her problem.

“Wha? Well, there’s bound to be quite a few nut job that will be willing to come forward and claim they are this gaurdian. All we really have to do is to bide our time till one of them actually decides to surface. Then we’ll make an example of them. If you catch my drift.” The guard suggested.

“That’s a nice thought, but then we’ll have an even worse situation on our hands. The last thing we need is some nut job becoming a martyr. We need something a little better than that my friend.” Falishea sighed in frustration.
“Ok, then we could have this nut job join sides with your father. I’m sure your father can manage that along with his other many, many talents.” The guard gave yet another suggestion. This one Falishea found more than satisfactory.

“Yes! That’s perfect! Daddy will love it. You always have such brilliant ideas. Why hasn’t Father made you part of his council?” she squealed with delight. The guard laughed sheepishly and shrugged.

“Your father knows what he’s doing. He has me employed to do the task that I’m most suited for. After all not everyone has the skill to protect the king’s daughter. Am I right?” He suggested in a playful almost boyishly prideful manner.

Still on that floaty note, he took on the task of removing his helm. His silky brown hair flowed from the brim. As he lifted in from his head. His baby blue eyes sparkled with mischief, and he finished by tossing her a flirtatious grin.

“Yes, my father’s intentions for me and this country are nothing but good. However, you make me wonder how merit friendly your’s are at times.” Falishea answered and returned his grin with one with her own. She’d once again been drawn into the unspoken game. To see who could flatter the other the most.

[wut2say]

hmmm, cool. I like it. though the picky me found some either typo's or just silly errors, but those can easily be fixed. Everything else i'm going to assume will be explained a bit more as it goes on?

hence the idea of a story...

[Pandora]

yes of course.
It's just a little tidbit to get the reader on board so that they arn't totally lost when they start reading into the actual story.

The character in this chapter doesn't really have a very big part in the book, but I can say she is that one person you just love to hate.

[wut2say]

ah fun....the one thing i would like (as a personal preference, which really, all advice is for the most part)

I would like to hear more about the guardian lady. She seems cool, and the guard man (yes, i love vague descriptions) did a nice little spiel, but maybe you could get some type of different perspective background on her. Like maybe a book excerpt that appears right after this, or have the hag go on a bit more of a description as she's being dragged away....


Ignore me if you please, just throwing it out there.

[Pandora]

you are in luck she is one of the main characters of the story, and should appear in most of my books. Although this book will more than likely be her biggest.

Hee, hee, the guard, he does have a larger part. He doesn't appear much, but he is talked about quite a bit. I'll go ahead and let this secret slip, he does have something to do with the rebels.
and the hag, maybe i should have he doing a bit more objecting about being dragged away.

I love suggestions, since this still is a work in progress.

[Falconer]

Pandora...

When you get this published...

SEND ME A COPY!

This is great, I look forward to reading more.

[Pandora]

Wow! XD thanks, I feel special now.
I'd be honored to send you a copy. I just hope you think the rest of the book is just as good.