My story

Armongar · Post by **Armongar** » Sat Sep 10, 2005 12:00 pm

Hi. I'm new. But what I realy want is advise. I'm writeing a story about a boy named Glenn who wants to be trained as a knight. BUt he finds out that he has magic running through his veins(instead of blood) so he is destend to be a Mage. This is just very basic and I'm already 146 pages into it(it is a story not a book) but I feel like its lame...you know not cool enough. What could put in it that would make it exiting? What do you want to read? How can I make it more fantsy? There are strange creatures and all that stuff and a good plot line(I think

) BUt I feel like its going away.....maybe I'm losing iinterest....Help?

Niveus Draco · Post by **Niveus Draco** » Sat Sep 10, 2005 3:25 pm

How can he be alive if he doesn't have any blood?

Chalgrish · Post by **Chalgrish** » Sat Sep 10, 2005 3:27 pm

As for the story, I admire your spunk, but honestly, it sounds like you have spent about 5 mintues thinking it up. And you don't spell very well, either

Niveus Draco · Post by **Niveus Draco** » Sat Sep 10, 2005 5:50 pm

Now now, no need for insults. You need to throw in a couple of twists into the story. Without any twists it would be boring. Maybe that's why you are losing interest.

dragonfan123 · Post by **dragonfan123** » Thu Oct 27, 2005 8:13 am

As a writer myself, I think what he said about the twist was right. About every book that I have read had a twist. And even if you make it a series, make the end of it so that it leaves the reader hanging.

Just thought you might want to know that.

Taluscion · Post by **Taluscion** » Thu Oct 27, 2005 4:35 pm

I think you should have a girl in the story that likes him, but he likes another girl...who is actually royalty, so he can't have her, but he wants her and forgets the girl who wants him, who then gets killed and he realizes he actually loved her...**takes a deep breath**

ice dragon · Post by **ice dragon** » Thu Oct 27, 2005 5:02 pm

dude look we have a (magic)guy rite a dragon a princesess but put a twist like the dragon is her pet or somthing ????

dragonfan123 · Post by **dragonfan123** » Fri Oct 28, 2005 8:06 am

Mr. E · Post by **Mr. E** » Fri Oct 28, 2005 3:16 pm

I agree with the twists and romance adds, maybe there could be a group of thieves that want him in his group, though he doesn't want to be in it but an enchantment is slowly taking over making him evil???

ice dragon · Post by **ice dragon** » Sat Oct 29, 2005 12:45 pm

see not so hard and im terrible at storys

ice dragon · Post by **ice dragon** » Wed Nov 02, 2005 4:14 pm

have u given up the story

whiplash · Post by **whiplash** » Wed Nov 16, 2005 6:34 pm

Add a dragon that befriends the knight, or an evil person he kills and realizes it wads his father. Don't give up.

whiplash

catdragon0 · Post by **catdragon0** » Tue Nov 22, 2005 11:55 pm

hey why dont you add like an elf or some other mistical creature as well.